We at Dollar Store Dollar understand that sometimes you buy things and then realize you made a terrible mistake. That's life. However, we have a "maybe we'll help you" policy that might work in your favor if the stars align correctly.

If the price of $DSD drops by more than 50% within 30 days of your purchase, you may be eligible for a partial refund. Here's what you need to do:

• Bring your original receipt (we know you probably threw it away)
• Fill out form 47-B in triplicate
• Wait in line at our customer service desk (bring a book, it's a long wait)
• Convince our manager that you're not trying to scam us
• Cross your fingers and hope for the best

If approved, refunds will be processed in the following manner:

• Store Credit Only - No cash refunds (we don't have that kind of money)
• Processing time: 6-8 business weeks (or months, we're not sure)
• Refund amount: Up to 25% of your original purchase price
• Administrative fee: $5.00 (because paperwork is expensive)

• Buyer's remorse (that's on you)
• Market crashes (we warned you it was risky)
• Lost or stolen tokens (should have written down your seed phrase)
• Regret over life choices (we can't help with that)
• Any losses over $1.00 (that's our limit)

In rare cases, we may offer additional compensation if:

• You can prove the price drop was due to our website being down
• You're a regular customer (we have like 3 of those)
• You bring us donuts
• The manager is in a good mood

For rollback requests, please contact:

• Phone: 1-800-DONT-BOTHER (we never answer)
• Email: rollbacks@dollarstoredollar.fake
• In Person: Come to our store and ask for "The Manager"
• Hours: When we feel like it

This policy is not legally binding. We reserve the right to change, modify, or completely ignore this policy at any time. By purchasing $DSD tokens, you acknowledge that you have read and understood that we probably won't help you if something goes wrong.